Children
I have been thinking a lot lately about some of the children that were once a part of my life. Some are no longer children, but well to me they still are, as that is the age I remember them to be. Wonder why things happened as they did, which there has to be a reason right? Just not sure what possible reason there is or could ever be.
I don't talk much about the work I use to do, but I think of them kids often. Don't remember some of their names, but their eyes are still vivid in my memory. Not sure what you see when you look into a child's eyes, but I see so much. One little girl in particular just, well, haunts me is the only way I can think to put it. Absolutely beautiful little girl, she was 4 when I first met her. I worked with children whose parents had drug/alcohol addictions. I am not a counselor, I did playgroups with them. The goal was to get them to socialize and play with one another. Natural for most kids, but not all. Anyhow I won't go on about what the group was about and such.
The moment I looked into this lil ones eyes... well my heart just fell. Just the thought still brings tears to my eyes. The light was just gone, her eyes were so dark, so beyond her years. She carried such a weight within her soul, she had been through more in them short years than many see in their whole lives. I knew her for a year and a half through that group, yet never once did she ever speak. She would walk in and give a lil smile and come sit by me, she would just follow me the whole time there just watching. Well on good days, other times she would go sit by herself and stare off usually at her feet. Yet everytime when she walked in I would hold my breathe waiting for her to say hello. You just never give up hope. Such a small word I know, but think of all that lil word would have carried and meant for such a child. And today I sit here and can't help but wonder, do the teachers that work with her now hear her voice. Or is that lil girl still sitting alone against that wall?
A lot of kids came in and out of my life at that time, however honestly none of them ever truelly leave. As every child leaves an impression upon your soul.
I don't talk much about the work I use to do, but I think of them kids often. Don't remember some of their names, but their eyes are still vivid in my memory. Not sure what you see when you look into a child's eyes, but I see so much. One little girl in particular just, well, haunts me is the only way I can think to put it. Absolutely beautiful little girl, she was 4 when I first met her. I worked with children whose parents had drug/alcohol addictions. I am not a counselor, I did playgroups with them. The goal was to get them to socialize and play with one another. Natural for most kids, but not all. Anyhow I won't go on about what the group was about and such.
The moment I looked into this lil ones eyes... well my heart just fell. Just the thought still brings tears to my eyes. The light was just gone, her eyes were so dark, so beyond her years. She carried such a weight within her soul, she had been through more in them short years than many see in their whole lives. I knew her for a year and a half through that group, yet never once did she ever speak. She would walk in and give a lil smile and come sit by me, she would just follow me the whole time there just watching. Well on good days, other times she would go sit by herself and stare off usually at her feet. Yet everytime when she walked in I would hold my breathe waiting for her to say hello. You just never give up hope. Such a small word I know, but think of all that lil word would have carried and meant for such a child. And today I sit here and can't help but wonder, do the teachers that work with her now hear her voice. Or is that lil girl still sitting alone against that wall?
A lot of kids came in and out of my life at that time, however honestly none of them ever truelly leave. As every child leaves an impression upon your soul.
posted by debbie at 2:55 PM
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